7-25-05

Quote of the day:
"My machine will take off a head in a twinkling, and the victim will feel nothing but a slight sense of refreshing coolness on the neck. We cannot make too much haste, gentlemen, to allow the nation to enjoy this advantage." Dr. Joseph Ignace Guillotin

Thought of the day:
Remember a good time we had some yesterday ago and smile today, for who knows what tomorrow might bring.

7-25-05

Quote of the day:
"Women who seek to be equals with men lack ambition." Timothy Leary

Thought of the day:
I find I get into this cycle where I repeated the same thing a lot. It can be a word or phrase or a story. Most times without being aware of it. I notice that my thought of the day yesterday was similar to no one I did a while back, I know I've used the same quote more than once, but I think that has more to do with not remember that I'd used it already.

7-24-05

Quote of the day:
"If you jot down every silly thought that pops into your mind, you will soon find out everything you most seriously believe." mignon McLaughlin

Thought of the day:
I wonder if you could really handle every thought that pops into my mind. I know I can't.

7-23-05

Quote of the day:
"A good man is always a beginner." Martial

Thought of the day:
How'd I end up here?

7-22-05

Quote of the day:
"I am always with myself, and it is I who am my tormentor." Leo Tolstoy

Thought of the day:
...it's Friday...I'm insane. It's been a ruff week and I'm tired. But I'm not here to wine about my bullshit life. Actually I thought I'd offer some insane ways to enjoy your Friday. Drive around all day till you find Mister Softy, tell'm I said hi. Kiss a baby, dog, and/or a fool today. Pull on my beard for luck. Dial 1-800-9-FRANCE. Leave me a message on my answering machine screaming. Fly to Mexico and see if you can get some hot Mexican to marry you for citizenship. Put on your sluttiest outfit and go to church. Buy a soda at Toys-r-us and laugh as they ask if you need batteries. Tell them your phone number is 1-800-9FRANCE when they ask for that too. Buy a bunch of candy and see how many kids will take it from you. Dress up like Ronald McDonald and eat at Burger King. Ask me about my new tired as if they were something exciting. Use the word "retarded" excessively today until someone gets offended. Give yourself an odd sun tan/burn today. A star over your eye like Paul Stanly from KISS would be fun. Call up your highschool Algebra teacher and bitch how you still don't use that shit. Wear a Halloween costume or prom dress to work without explanation. Search the Internet for interracial uncircumcised she-male midget porn. Shave your head. Well, whatever you do today, do it till it hurts!

7-21-05

Quote of the day:
"Falling out of love is chiefly a matter of forgetting how charming someone is." Iris Murdoch

Thought of the day:
I saw on the news once this man on trial for the murder of several women. They showed the families of the victims making statements in court. Most were rather angry as you'd expect. The one always stood out to me though. It was a larger man, who's daughter was killed and possibly raped by the man on trial. He didn't shout, curse, or anything at the man. He told him that threw his faith in Jesus he forgave the man. To this day I still don't know what to think of it. Part of me thinks it's beautiful that someone could show such forgiveness. While part of me thinks it's insulting to his daughter that he could forgive a man who did that to her. In the end I think at the very least it makes me wonder at what I'm capable of forgiving. In comparison any nonsense in my life is petty much bull shit not to forgive.

7-20-05

Quote of the day:
"Nature is honest, we aren't; we embalm our dead." Ugo Betti

Thought of the day:
Do you have any idea how hard it was to spell "cirrhosis" yesterday? Then the difference between "your" and "you're," English is a pain in the ass sometimes.

7-19-05

Quote of the day:
"If you are of the opinion that the contemplation of suicide is sufficient evidence of a poetic nature, do not forget that actions speak louder than words." Fran Lebowitz


Thought of the day:
Life's a drinking game! Your boss is an asshole...DRINK! Someone hit your car...DRINK! A loved one died...DRINK! Your brother slept with your girlfriend...DRINK! Your sister slept with your girlfriend...DRINK! Everyone slept with your girlfriend...DRINK! You lost your arm in NAM...DRINK! Your fat...DRINK! Your uncle molested you...DRINK! She stopped calling you...DRINK! You got a DUI...DRINK! September 11th...DRINK! You still live at home...DRINK! Your pregnant...DRINK! Bush is re-elected...DRINK! Your ugly...DRINK! You're the father...DRINK! It hurts to pee...DRINK! She gave back the ring...DRINK! They cancelled CHIP's...DRINK! You don't even have the ball for suicide...DRINK! Your getting old...DRINK! Taxes...DRINK! Cramps...DRINK! Impotance...DRINK! Constipated...DRINK! Harvey Keitel naked...DRINK! Caught masterbating...DRINK! Raped...DRINK! Arrested...DRINK! Broke...DRINK! Failed...DRINK! Caught in zipper...DRINK! Everyone says you're a whore...DRINK! You'll never get laid...DRINK! You can't read...DRINK! Ripped off...DRINK! You've died of cirrhosis...YOU WIN!

7-18-05

Quote of the day:
"Ordering a man to write a poem is like commanding a pregnant woman to give birth to a red-headed child." Cari Sandburg


Thought of the day:
We're all criminals, hell most of you probably commit a crime everyday. You've littered, went over the speed limit, drank under age, maybe stole something or tried drugs. Really if they caught everything some of you that read this have done every time you did it, you'd be doing serious time in jail. Is this a flaw in our legal system? Is it that the system is corrupt or that we are. Probably a bit of both. Something to think about next time you're smoking crack, eh!

7-17-05

Quote of the day:
"My way of joking is to tell the truth. It's the funniest joke in the world." George Bernard Shaw

Thought of the day:
....I'm just not in the mood today for this

7-16-05

Quote of the day:
"Love is the delusion that one woman differs from another." H. L. Mencken


Thought of the day:
I always loved this quote, but can't say that I really agree with it. I just keep waiting for someone to prove it's wrong though. For those who think it's a sexist statement, I honestly think it'd be just as true if you changed it from "woman" to just plain "man."

7-15-05

Quote of the day:
"A man is known by the company he avoids." Unknown

Thought of the day:
Happiness is a lie they tried to sell me when I was young. Like Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, God, and Love. The more I live the greater my disgust with life grows. It's all a pile of puke and were each given a spoon at birth. The only difference is the size of the spoon were handed. So dig in, but realize the more you try to swollow the more you'll eventually end up adding the the pile!

7-14-05

Quote of the day:
"Love your enemies in case your friends turn out to be a bunch of bastards." R.A. Dickson

Thought of the day:
Why is it the words cunt and/or bitch seem to set most women off? Oddly enough it's usually one or the other too. They are such generic and unorginal ways of telling someone off. Myself you can call me a dick, asshole, shit head, bastard, whatever and it's all the same lame tired old bull shit that doesn't matter at all. Hell you can call me a bitch and again it doesn't make no difference. So if these words don't bother you, bravo to you!, but if your going to refer to it as the "c-word" all I can say is grow up ya dumb bitch! It's just a word!

7-13-05

Quote of the day:
"Don't talk unless you can improve the silence." Vermont Proverb

Thought of the day:
Just because someone tells you that you're smart or clever doesn't mean it's true. They could just be more foolish than you are. If someone tells you that your funny on the other hand you can trust it more. It doesn't take any intelligance to tell if you're funny.

7-12-05

Quote of the day:
"I read the book of Job last night -- I don't think God comes well out of it." Virginia Woolf

Thought of the day:
I wonder if anyone's ever thought about me when they masturbated?

7-11-05

Quote of the day:
"Of the demonstrably wise there are but two: those who commit suicide, and those who keep their reasoning faculties atrophied by drink." Mark Twain


Thought of the day:
I'm against the death penalty, not because I think it's wrong but because I don't really think it's much of a punishment. I know if I was given the choice between life in prison or death, I'd be finding them a nice vane real quick. Lets face it we're all gonna die, at least they know when and that it'll be quick & relatively painless. Sounds like your doing them a favor.

7-10-05

Quote of the day:
"Men are mortal, but ideas are immortal." Walter Lippmann


Thought of the day:
Be not a slave to your dreams.

7-09-05

Quote of the day:
"Some people are like Slinkies.They're really good for nothing. But they still bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs." My sister sent me this, I don't know it's origin. Maybe she came up with it.



Thought of the day:
Life's too short to drink beer and drive a Ford.

7-08-05

Quote of the day:
"A bayonet is a weapon with a worker at both ends." British pacifist slogan


Thought of the day:
Being uncle Dave doesn't carry too much responsibility, but I do have to get birthday gifts. So I've been shopping for my niece's. I'm not exactly an expert on what to get a 4 year old girl. One thing I did notice is the difference between the boy's section and the girl's. Everything is so bright pink and glittery in the girls. All the toys have smiles, well except the baby dolls which kinda looked creepy. While all the boys things are dark and mean looking. Also all the boy's stuff have a villain, while even the girl toys that I know have bad guys, like all them Disney princesses didn't have a toy of them. So which is getting the better message, the gun or the oven. For as much as some might bitch about the gender roles, I have to say at least the oven is civilized. But when it's all said and done, I have to respect the fact that boys are getting the evil with the good and not some message that the world is rainbows and sunshine just. As for pick out a toy for my niece, I'm guessing picking the doll I think is the hottest is the wrong way to go?

7-07-05

Quote of the day:
"Responsibility n: A detachable burden easily shifted to the shoulders of God, Fate, Fortune, Luck or one's neighbor. In days of astrology it was customary to unload it upon a star." Ambrose Bierce


Thought of the day:
You can learn a lot about yourself by asking who your friends are and who your enimies are, and why?

7-06-05

Quote of the day:
The Maxims of men disclose their hearts." French Proverb

Thought of the day:
Always aim for the heart.

7-05-05

Quote of the day:
"We should trust our president in every decision that he makes, and we should just support that and be faithful in what happens." Britney Spears


Thought of the day:
...and you thought the dumb cunt was just a lousy singer!

7-04-05

Quote of the day:
"America is so vast that almost everything said about it is likely to be true, and the opposite is probably equally true." James T. Farrell

Thought of the day:
Happy Birthday America! What do you get the country that wants everything?

7-03-05

Quote of the day:
"Knowledge is the antidote to fear." Emerson

Thought of the day:
You can't really "steal a kiss" because it will cost you something. But it's likely worth the price.

7-02-05

Quote of the day:
"Pain and death are a part of life. To reject them is to reject life itself." Havelock Ellis


Thought of the day:
Some days aren't worth even trying to figure out where you've woke up.

7-01-05

Quote of the day:
"When a dog bites a man that is not news; but when a man bites a dog that is news." John B. Bogart

Thought of the day:
There is a liberation in not giving a damn.

6-30-05

Quote of the day:
"You know what you do when you shit, singing is the same thing, only up!" Enrico Caruso

Thought of the day:
Looking at the world I have to wonder who can you trust? The pentagon recently hired a marking firm to create a database of high school student 16-18. Getting things like e-mail addresses, Social Security numbers, and grade point averages. They recently found P. E. T. A. dumping dead animals into other people's dumpsters.You've got priests raping children and the people who turned a blind eye to it are being promoted. So is there anyone or anything that's left that we can trust? Is trust just a prelude to betrayal?

6-29-05

Quote of the day:
"No man would listen to you talk if he didn't know it was his turn next." Ed Howe

Thought of the day:
Man do I love central air! Especially since it's ball sack sticking to your leg like silly putty hot out!

6-28-05

Quote of the day:
"Good behavior is the last refuge of mediocrity." Henry S. Haskins

Thought of the day:
I don't wonder so much if my "Thought of the day" changes your opinion of me, as much as if it changes it for the better or the worst.

6-27-05

Quote of the day:
"Judge a man by his questions rather than by his answers." Voltaire

Thought of the day:
I find it ironic that lies often bring happiness and truth often brings pain.

6-26-05

Quote of the day:
"What I got in Sunday-School . . . was simply a firm conviction that the Christian faith was full of palpable absurdities, and as carried on by Christians, seems to me to be debasing rather than ennobling. It involves groveling before a Being who, if He really exists, deserves to be denounced instead of respected." H. L. Mencken

Thought of the day:
Everyday is a gift, but remember some gifts are lousy and not what we wanted.

6-25-05

Quote of the day:
"Man is the only animal that can remain on friendly terms with the victims he intends to eat until he eats them." Samual Butler


Thought of the day:
Hope can be a life preserver or an anchor.